Tuesday, December 20, 2011

Christmas Time is Here

  Ah, Christmas. The time of year where my mom makes cookies, my dad gets even more agitated than he already is by life, and my brother desecrates his Santa Claus hat by scrawling "Now I have a machine gun" above the "Ho Ho Ho!" pre-written on it. The time of year where they spew crap about world peace that nobody believes, people elbow each other in the face to get a doll their kids'll dump in two weeks anyway, and every show conceivable (and some not) come out with a Christmas (oh, I mean "holiday"--wait, no I don't) episode. It's the season where I beg my dad to let me go ice-skating (even though there's no place near our "apartment community" and I don't exactly know how) and bake gingerbread houses (even though we don't have the time). It's the season where I hear Twisted Sister sing "Silver Bells" and watch Christopher Chance and his merry sidekicks rampage through a mall. It's the season of giant trees, stars, carolers, and food.
  I love this Christmas-y time of year. 
  There's just so many good things about Christmas. Snow falls, if you're lucky. Santa the jolly prowler and his reindeer. Beauty and the Beast--The Enchanted Christmas. Teachers give you a break because it's the last week before Christmas vacation. Radio stations replace their usual crap with Christmas crap. Ditto for TV. 
  There's also bad things about Christmas, of course. The Dollar Tree gets so crowded that you can't breathe. Traffic. Forced socialization with certain relatives you can't stand. Things like that.
  But overall, it's a good season. My favorite, actually. And I know you're expecting me to wish it came more than once a year. But I'm not going to. I've seen the Fairly OddParents Christmas special way too many times. I know what happens when you do that. Plus, I think we all would get sick of it after that long. There's only so much love and joy you can take before you want to kill somebody, right? 

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